Why is it so difficult to find out what I want?

‘What do I want to achieve?’, ‘What do I want with my life?’, and ‘What do I really want?’. They are tormenting questions that, if you struggle with career doubts, you can endlessly ponder.

Why is it so difficult to answer the question ‘what do I really want’? There are several reasons for this.

1. Many people are, consciously or unconsciously, steered in a certain direction throughout their lives by things that have to be done and things that simply happen as they do. They think there is no choice and therefore do not give much energy to what they truly want deep down inside.

Take a moment to consider how you have made your career choices so far. Were these conscious choices made by you, or were they influenced by parents/teachers/friends, or did jobs ‘coincidentally’ come your way? Or have you very consciously made a career plan and taken control?

2. It can be too daunting to contemplate what you truly want. Because deep down, it also means that you have to make choices and let go of habits, ideas, and interactions with some people in your life. Change will come, and change is often exciting and can make people nervous. It may mean that you will start doing things differently.

And isn’t that exactly what you want? Or maybe not?

3. You confuse your real desires with conditions. You think you can only fulfill your true wishes if you first get a ……. (inheritance/win the lottery , etc.). But that may never happen, and thus your wish will never be fulfilled. What a pity!

4. The obstacles in your way, meaning there are all sorts of things in your head that prevent you from pursuing your wish. Does this sound familiar to you? Who doesn’t have them?

If you have read this and think, yes, I actually don’t know, don’t think this is strange. It happens more often; I see it with my clients too and I help them.

A career coach can provide the solution. Together we work towards the following results:

✔️Know who you are and what you want, so you can express this with full confidence;

✔️Clarity in your thoughts and choices so you stop worrying;

✔️Transform your limiting beliefs that hinder your development;

✔️Understand which job will give you more fulfillment and joy;

✔️A concrete action plan to steer your career in the desired direction.

Do you have questions? Feel free to email me at Connect@feliciaportier.nl or request a free Career Development conversation. In this free 30-minute video call, we will look at your current work situation, what you would like to change, and how you can get there.